There are too many articles out there that cover this, so I don’t plan to link anything specific (this time). The Boyfriend did make a valid observation recently, though – that I probably need to start citing the resources where I get some of my material, just in case. Buuuuuut… most of it is just Google AI doin a gather for me and I copy/paste from that. So yeah. Idfk. 😅

Ok, I lied. I’ll link Dr. Sarah Edwards, because I’m pretty sure she’s the main one that brought this topic to life in a way that us Spoonies and other mental health sufferers can relate to.

Buuuuut… Google says that “Impossible Tasks” are also known as “Sisyphean” tasks. Ooooh… Greek mythology?! You have my attention! 😛 Hooray for anime Sisyphus as my cover picture! Hehe (Anyone else notice his weird finger issues?!)

So I don’t actually know the story of Sisyphus, merely a basic idea. I guess he has to push this giant rock up a hill forever as some form of punishment against Zeus (who seems like a petulant asshole, no?!). The message of it really does fit with Dr. Sarah’s, though, in that we face seemingly Impossible Tasks on a daily basis. Except… the Impossible Tasks SHE refers to aren’t things that “normal” people would see as impossible.

For example: getting out of bed in the morning. I know a lot of individuals who are perfectly capable of hopping right out of bed, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to start their day with gusto…

Ew! Keep that shit the hell away from me! 😛

Needless to say, that doesn’t work for me. I’ve actually gotten much better at getting out of bed. I used to ABHOR waking up and having to start another day. It really was an Impossible Task for me. Being in safer environments (i.e. escaping The Plague) has slowly brought me up and out of that. It’s still difficult, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t dread it nearly as much.

Digress. Digress. Aaaaand Digress.

Basically, Impossible Tasks are things that we feel little to no motivation to do, no matter how “simple” they may seem to anyone else. Dread overwhelms us and we can’t drag ourselves out of that to do whatever Impossible Task we face, avoiding them at all costs sometimes. And for me? These things can vary day-to-day depending on how I feel (mentally and/or physically). Showering used to be an Impossible Task, and sometimes it still is, but for the most part I’ve changed that into a “Self Care” thing – something I utilize when my emotions are triggered/overwhelmed. For instance, ugly-snot crying. It’s gross doing that anywhere outside the shower, having to use tissues or whatever fabric is available at the time. So yeah, hopping in the shower and sitting down, under some steamy hot water? Much better. Then I can just rinse off and take a nap.

A few other examples that come up:

• Traversing Stairs – my knees are having a flare-up party these past few days, so stairs of any number, up or down, are extremely painful
• Making Myself Food – I haven’t been very good at this in general for years (ugh), but I recently had my Trintellix meds (for TRMDD) upped and the fun side-effect of that is that I HAVE to take it with food or I get nauseous.
• Confrontation – of any kind. Oddly, I do ok with it when it comes to The Boyfriend (or past romantic relationships), but I haven’t psychoanalyzed that too much (I think it’s bc I see them as equals, not authorities). But yeah… thanks to The Plague’s influence, anyone raising their voice at me (or near me, even) sets me into cPTSD-mode immediately. I mean, I’m almost always in Survival Mode anyway, but it ramps that up significantly. Even the thought of having to “confront” someone can do me in. And this one is legitimately THE bane of my existence.
• Phone Calls – Bruh. I hate them so much. I can do texting or in-person shite all day long, but for some weird reason, talking on the phone is anxiety-inducing for me. I’m doing a bit better lately, but I still get triggered when someone calls me out of nowhere with zero warning.
• Journaling – I know, I know. It doesn’t seem like this is an Impossible Task for me, if you look back at the many posts I’ve made, huh? But, if you’ve read the first couple entries, you’ll know that this is a thing I’ve struggled with committing to for decades. This Blog is literally the first time I’ve ever consistently written and for weeks… I’m pretty proud of myself, to be honest. However, there have been a couple of missed days, because I just couldn’t be bothered. The determination wasn’t there, for whatever reason. And even today, with the headache I have currently… I didn’t wanna.

I’m sure I could come up with more, but as I said… headache. I’m glad I had some forethought and created Drafts that I could pick from when I feel like this.

Anyhoo… do you have any Impossible Tasks?