So Sayeth the Google (and it’s a lot of good info): Intrusive thoughts are unwanted, unwelcome, and often disturbing thoughts, images, or urges that pop into one’s mind without warning. They are common, and while often distressing, they are not typically harmful or indicative of mental illness. However, when these thoughts become persistent, intrusive, and lead to significant distress or interfere with daily life, they may be associated with conditions like obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). 

What are intrusive thoughts?

• Uninvited and Unwanted: They appear suddenly and against one’s will. 
• Disturbing or Unsettling: They can be violent, sexual, or socially unacceptable, and may go against one’s values. 
• Not Actions: Intrusive thoughts are not desires to act on the content of the thought. 
• Varied Themes: Common themes include harm, contamination, sexual acts, or making mistakes. 
• Not Always Associated with Mental Illness: While intrusive thoughts can be a part of OCD and other conditions, many people experience them without having a mental health disorder. 

Examples of Intrusive Thoughts:

• Harm: Thoughts of harming oneself or others, even though there’s no desire to do so. 
• Sexual Thoughts: Unwanted sexual images or urges, even if they are taboo or against one’s values. 
• Contamination: Fear of germs, illness, or being contaminated. 
• Socially Unacceptable Behavior: Thoughts of shouting obscenities or acting inappropriately in public. 
• Doubt: Doubting whether tasks were completed correctly or worrying about making mistakes. 

What causes intrusive thoughts?

• Brain’s Natural Functioning:.The brain is constantly processing information, and intrusive thoughts can be a byproduct of this process. 
• Stress and Anxiety:.Stress, anxiety, and lack of sleep can trigger or exacerbate intrusive thoughts. 
• Biological Factors:.Hormone shifts can also play a role in some cases. 
• Underlying Mental Health Conditions:.Conditions like OCD, PTSD, and depression can be associated with more persistent and distressing intrusive thoughts. 

What to do if you experience intrusive thoughts:

• Recognize and Accept:Acknowledge that the thoughts are intrusive and not necessarily indicative of your intentions or character. 
• Don’t Engage:Try not to dwell on or analyze the thoughts, as this can make them more persistent. 
• Distract Yourself:Engage in activities that can help you shift your focus away from the thoughts, according to Harvard Health. 
• Seek Professional Help:If intrusive thoughts are causing significant distress or impacting your ability to function, consider seeking help from a mental health professional. 

In summary, intrusive thoughts are common and often harmless. However, when they become frequent, distressing, or interfere with daily life, it’s important to understand their nature and seek support if needed. 

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Now then… if you were to ask me what I think intrusive thoughts are, I wouldn’t have given such a detailed and accurate info dump. Dis why I like the Google AI, insofar as it’s capable of it – most of the time. Other times, AI does an, “oooh that’s a good pic– damnit!”

Feet Shoes?! *facepalm* Outside of the fact that it totally fucked the feet/shoes part up, this is a pretty amazing picture. I tried to change it to my normal “woman with short black hair and glasses” theme, but it didn’t do anything similar, so I went with what I could settle for.

Buuuuut… I digress…

I have intrusive thoughts sometimes. This morning, for example, when The Boyfriend left… it woke me up when he came out of his room (we sleep separately on his work nights). In my sleepy stupor, I thought he’d left for work. When I saw the time after I sat up, I realized he hadn’t done that. He went out for walk/run – which is a great thing he’s just started as of today. I wish I could go with him.

But the intrusive thought was a continuation of the rejection I got last night when I tried to bring him in for a good night hug and he pulled away. I’m sure it wasn’t anything nefarious (tell my brain that), but… brain be doin brain things and I cried myself to sleep, thinking about all the rejections I’ve gone through in 10 months.

This morning’s was abandonment. I like it when he comes in to kiss/hug/say goodbye for the day. If I notice he hasn’t, it sucks. I’m working on it. But the prominent thought was, “Yep. He doesn’t want you any more. Give up on hoping that your ‘faith’ that he’ll come back to you after a while matters.”

Anyway, a lot of my intrusive thoughts are centered around the shit self-loathing that permeates every aspect of my life. Having been conditioned and abused so much, for so long, by The Plague (and subsequently, Gravity and The Dementor)… it’s really difficult to overcome the pervasive, intrusive thoughts that I’m not worth a damn to anyone.

Haha. I’ve also – previously – had the sucky realization that I’m AWARE of it and can’t do shit about it. They just happen. *shrug*

Another intrusive thought (theme of thoughts, really) I’ve had: I’ll be driving along, coming around a bend – where there’s a massive drop off – and wondering “what would happen if I just… drove off?!” There’s a proper terminology for those types, but I don’t remember what it is. If you know, please leave it in the comments. And for the record, I’d probly die of a heart attack before hitting the ground or water or whatever it is down there. I’m afraid of heights. No skydiving (or cliff driving?!) for me!

I’ve also had some where I think an automatic violent thought… like when Gravity gets under my skin and I want to punch him in the throat… with a chair…

The key thing to remember here is that these are all THOUGHTS – not actions. I’d never do physical violence to others (no matter how much I think about doing them to Gravity, lol), with the exception of self defense (pfft, as if I could) or protecting The Son (Mama Bear do a protecc). I’d also never just drive off a damn cliff. As I’ve said, I’m afraid of heights. And I am also in a lot of pain 24/7 already… imagine if I survived that shit?! No, thanks!