15.5 – For Last Week’s MM:

If you’re not willing to be laughed at, you’ll spend your life clapping for people who were.

There are graveyards full of people who constantly told themselves “one day.”

What are you avoiding right now because you’re afraid to be laughed at? What would it take to stop saying “one day” and finally go for it?

Do one thing this week that might make you look stupid. Hit send. Ask the “dumb” question. Try the skill you always said you’d learn “one day.” Then let me know how it goes.

Welp… I have to admit that I didn’t think about or do this past week’s stuff. I’ve been in a slump. A massive panic attack over an incident with The Boyfriend’s ex being in contact will do that. The chaos and turmoil, the aftermath (ugh, so much) of it all… was too much for my system. So what does my system do when I encounter something like that and it finally settles down?! Swings wildly to the other end… emotional flatlining. Numbness. Severe lack of motivation. I mean shit, I haven’t even wanted to play Minecraft.

So yeah… can’t say as though I’ve had the gumption to do anything that might make me look dumb, let alone anything else.

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16.0 – What We Forget to Be Thankful For

Two things for you to think about

Everything good comes to an end.
Learn from it. Grow from it. Be grateful for it.

Everything bad comes to an end.
Learn from it. Grow from it. Be grateful for it.

Reflect: Then consider sharing this thought with others.

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Four things for you to ask yourself

What’s something good in your life that ended? What did you learn?

What’s something bad in your life that ended? How did you grow?

Recommended: Use these as journaling prompts for the week.

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One thing for you to try this week

Write a “thank you” note to an ending. If you want, you can share it with me.

Remember: Small changes lead to lasting breakthroughs.

https://markmanson.net/

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As for how I’m doing… shared a bit of that up in the beginning. I’ve kinda just been existing and filling my time with shows. Things with The Boyfriend are mediocre… not bad but not great, I guess. Check-ins have mostly been easy and short, not much to talk about outside of “Program” things.

We did talk for over an hour last night, though. And it was fairly productive, in my opinion. I admitted to how I’ve been feeling the last couple weeks and how the Women’s Support Group went on Saturday, after he left to go have some free/fun time with a couple guy friends. I also admitted to how it makes me feel when he gets in an obviously (to me) grumpy mood and, rather than be vulnerable and share what’s bothering him (which opens up communication and understanding), he takes it out on me. Thing is… with the state of mind I’ve been in, it didn’t bother me nearly as much as usual. I was angry about it, but that fizzled out during D&D. *shrug*

I hope that my mood will improve soon, I’m getting pretty bored.