EnchiPants: a blog about the traumatic life of a nerdy girl who grew into a broken woman
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When Doves Cry
A “Rumination” on Empathy (Sorry, it’s a long one…) Cognitive vs. Emotional Cognitive Empathy, or “perspective-taking,” is the intellectual ability to identify and understand another person’s emotions, thoughts, and perspective without necessarily feeling them. It is often described as “thinking with” someone, acting as a rational, logical understanding of their situation. This skill is crucial for…
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Monday Mark – 27.5 & 28.0
27.5 – For Last Week’s MM: Accept this: You don’t have to prove anything to anybody, ever. Including yourself. The moment you stop asking for permission is when you realize it was never required. What have you been trying to prove lately? Whose permission do you seek? Pick one small decision you’ve been waiting for permission…
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Monday Mark – 26.5 & 27.0
26.5 – For Last Week’s MM: A great spouse makes everything else in your life easier.A bad spouse makes everything else in your life harder. Your romantic relationship is your highest leverage choice in life. Every healthy relationship starts with two people who have healthy relationships with themselves. Any toxic relationship is the result of at…
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Monday Mark – 25.5 & 26.0
25.5 – For Last Week’s MM: You can have anything you want in life. You just can’t have everything you want. The game of life is trade-offs. Being willing to disappoint people is the only way to be truly free. Who are you afraid of disappointing if you really go for what you want? Choose one trade-off you want, and…
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Tomorrow…
These last few days have been a conglomerate of sinking mood, worsening pain, one half-day headache, and ruminations about life in general. Tuesday I had a really rough EMDR session, where we dug deep into my abandonment issues. I learned a lot, but it left me feeling completely drained. I took a nap immediately afterwards.…
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It’s ironic and sad that I can remember when I used to have an innocent and fantastical perspective about life, despite how very long ago that was for me. It has systematically been eroded over the course of my 43 years. The very first “scary” incident I remember happening was when my brother fell over…
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I Love Colorado
Let me just say this… I knew Arkansas sucked, but I didn’t realize how badly they sucked until I moved here to Colorado. First of all, I’m riding the Struggle Bus again when it comes to getting something written daily for my blog. It’s fallen by the wayside and I can’t seem to grab ahold…
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Monday Mark – 24.5 & 25.0
24.5 – For Last Week’s MM: Actions are your values made real. You can talk and talk, but at the end of the day, your actions never lie. Is there something you tell yourself you value but your actions don’t follow?Is there something you tell others you value but your actions don’t follow? Pick one thing…
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ADHD Research – Phase 5
Here we are, with my ADHD brain having been inspired to dive into the depths of Research once again. I touched up on my last phase – because damn, I forgot what I wrote about in less than 3 months. Also… it’s really friggin long! The inspiration? Learning about the Limbic System in the Recovery…
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Monday Mark – 23.5 & 24.0
23.5 – For Last Week’s MM: “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” – Carl Rogers The best way to become the person you want to be is to put yourself in a situation where you have no choice but to become them. Are you trying…
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The Back Deck Incident
In the interest of not having much motivation to blog/journal, let alone something to talk about… I’ve titled this as what my EMDR therapist and myself are calling the memory of when my brain “broke” and Anhedonia took over. It seemed fitting enough, since we started working on it yesterday. It was rough, but necessary,…
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Monday Mark – 22.5 & 23.0
22.5 – For Last Week’s MM: Do you have trouble saying “no”? Why do you think you do? Say “no” to one thing you’d normally say “yes” to, then regret later. If you’re not sure how, download my free Boundaries, Solved Guide. This is a work in progress for me. I used to be a people pleaser, but I…
The Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with One Step – Lao Tzu
From the: Tao te Ching
Who IS EnchiPants?! 