EnchiPants: a blog about the traumatic life of a nerdy girl who grew into a broken woman
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Maintenance
I just spent the last 20 minutes going through about 5 pages of my blogs to catch up on sorting them into categories. I’m really glad there’s a “quick edit” option that I can just select which category I need to put the post in. I seriously need to remember to select the category when…
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Monday Mark – 14.5 & 15.0
14.5 – For Last Week’s MM: Everything you believe will one day fail you. Let it. Because that’s how you grow. When’s the last time you said, “I changed my mind”? Is there a “truth” you hold onto that might actually be holding you back? Pick one belief you’ve never questioned and ask: “What if I’m…
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Safety First
Whew. This is a deep one, yeah? I sat and pondered this question for a few, because I feel like my knee-jerk answer (to be seen as “kind”) was merely surface level and not nearly accurate enough. While I do wish to be seen as someone that is kind, it doesn’t do justice to all…
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Side Quest!
This one will be brief 😛 I made friends (on FB) with The Boyfriend’s step-sister fairly early on. From the little bit we’ve interacted, she seems like a good egg. Great sense of humor and kind. I also found out that we are Birthday Twins! How cool is that?! We were finally able to get…
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Forgetful
Does childhood trauma cause forgetfulness? Yes, childhood trauma can cause memory loss, including fragmented memories, gaps in time, and a general difficulty recalling past events. This often happens due to the brain’s use of dissociation as a defense mechanism to cope with overwhelming stress, which can disconnect a person from their experiences, making it hard to form and retain memories. …
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That First Sip
One of the small pleasures I have left in life is that first sip of coffee in the morning, just before I come upstairs to blog. Anhedonia has robbed me of so much joy that it’s impossible to find and feel anything positive. Despite that, I do try. I check in with my emotions at…
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Late Today
I was distracted by Minecraft most of the day, but I finished a project I was working on, so there’s that! Had EMDR at 9am. For many weeks, we’ve been working on my earliest remembered trauma (here) – one that was actually repressed for a very long time. And today, the memory and all the…
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Monday Mark – 13.5 & 14.0
13.5 – For Last Week’s MM: Many of us misinterpret our need for strong friendships as a need for a romantic relationship. You can be happy without a partner. You cannot be happy without friends. Do you prioritize romance over friendships? How can you give more attention to your friends? Do something nice with or for…
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Down in the Dumps
Once again, things got rough between myself and The Boyfriend. Last night’s check-in was going well… until it wasn’t. This incident with his ex texting and him choosing to respond at all has really lit the flames of discourse between us. I asked if he still had any resentment about the situation (bc I was…
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Art & Science
I couldn’t pick just one, because both of these classes had a huge impact on me, but in different ways. The subjects themselves were things I loved, but it was the teachers that made the difference. Our school was so small that we had 62 students in our graduating class and I had the same…
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Panic Attack
Yesterday was rough, though it didn’t start out that way… I got up early and did the cat swapping, since we can now get back to the normal routines. Made coffee, got on my PC for blogging, made an adjustment in the video settings of Minecraft, and proceeded to spend the next hour or so…
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Taco Tuesday?!
Me, right now… I really, really didn’t want to get out of bed this morning. Mars was a butt and ran away to hide, because he knows the morning routine means getting put in the basement (lots of room). Over a year and multiple failed attempts to integrate Princess Fluffybutt (also known as Floof) with…
The Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with One Step – Lao Tzu
From the: Tao te Ching
Who IS EnchiPants?! 